Tuesday, September 19, 2017

The Awkward

I've decided to pull the blog out again for a time to process this time of transition in our life.  I had forgotten just how theurapeutic writing is for me. :)

Bring on the awkward.  I have no idea how to prepare my children for how awkward it will be to enter into life in the US.  From a broad standpoint, the cultures just aren't that different.  Sure, it is a different language, but my kids speak English and have been in bilingual school.  They have learned to eat some American foods and have had their share of Burger King and Pizza Hut and the other random fast food chains that the US has sent to Honduras.  We know most of the popular music and have seen most recent movies.  So, you know, not a hard transition, right?  Wrong.  I'm worried about it and I lived the first 27 years of my life there.

When we walk into a room, my children will likely kiss you on the cheek.  All of you.  Whoever you happen to be :)  It doesn't matter if you're mid-conversation or didn't say hello to them.  They have spent the last however many years of their lives being reprimanded for not giving a proper greeting, and interrupting to make sure you greet everyone is part of that.  The value is placed on the newcomer being welcomed and the newcomer greeting.  The value is not on your conversation that you were having and whether you wanted to finish it or not.  So, if we are rude, excuse us.  We were only being polite!

And about productivity (this one was the hardest for me until I learned to love it)... In general, we are coming from a culture that values people over tasks.  What?!?  Not get all my things done in a day?  Or sometimes not do any of them at all.  Why are we late, constantly?  Well... that conversation went long, or I ran into someone and gave them a ride home, or I dropped everything to run to see a friend in need, etc.  Part of the lack of productivity in my daily life comes from poor systems in place and that I am more than ready to bid farewell (enter any governement transaction).  But the far greater reason for things not going according to plan is because people are far more important than whatever I needed to get done.  And you know what?  I like it.  I like it because I think it is actually true.  So when we're late it could be because someone pooped on the way out the door (which also happens), or maybe we're just taking a minute for people.

I can't even begin to imagine how often we are going to collectively speak to a salesperson or cashier in the wrong language.  And it is likely we will have little Spanish words intertwined in all of our English conversations because Spanglish is our jam in this house.  So when you don't understand what a cola is, it's a rubberband, not a coke.  And our grammer is all screwed up because even when we can get whole sentences out in English is comes out something like "The dog of Papi took a fart".  Direct translation going strong.  We'll adjust, but it could be awkward 'till we do!

No personal space.  My children don't even know what that is.  We all stand way to close to people and talk too close to your face.  Crowding you in line at the grocery store or at the check out counter is a given because if I don't, I will never get out of this place.  If I give an inch, someone else is sure to squeeze in there and I will be here forever.

I remember as a child that we had some Latino neighbors that lived in front of our house.  On Saturdays they had this weird custom of bringing their furniture outside and playing loud music and just hanging out outside all day long.  I used to think it was so weird.  Now that is my family.  Now granted, we may be living it up in the central AC and never set food out the door... hard to say :)

There are so many more...  I just know there will be all kinds of mixups and mistakes and cultural learning and relearning to do.  We hope to see it as an adventure, but there are days that it is sure to make us sad.  Be patient with us because we are going to have to change, but not forget because this is home too.  Remember we're third culture people now and we'll always live in the middle!

1 comment:

  1. I'd love to tell you it will be a piece of cake and not to worry, but I can't lie. I will say that God will teach you new things every step of the awkward, and that you'll probably always be a little awkward from here on out. But that's part of who you all are and what makes you unique and interesting! Some people will get it and they will be permanent in your life, some won't, and they won't be. For whatever reason, this is the journey you were all meant to take, and He always knows that reason even when we don't. Love to you all, we will pray you through the awkward. Lynn

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